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Canis Academicus

Canis Academicus (Inferior). Considerable variation but the following breed points are to be expected.

  • Air of charming naïvité (a common fault is for this to shade into bored cynicism as the animal matures).
  • Glossy coat.
  • Superb dentition.
  • Excellent leap (but often to the wrong conclusion).
  • Highly social and often found in large packs.

Canis Academicus (Superior). Mature form of the Inferior. Breed points.

  • Air of zombified stoicism, particularly noticeable in months of September, October, November, …
  • Leap slower, but usually better directed than the Inferior form.
  • Protective of the younger members of its species.
  • Prefers to hunt alone or in small packs.
  • Common faults: may chase own tail for protracted periods.

Canis Academicus (Administratus). Senile form of the Superior.

  • Pronounced tendency to bark up the wrong tree.
  • Highly dangerous when encountered in large organised packs.
  • Common diseases: prone to foot-in-mouth disease, frequently rabid.
Last modified: 13/6/23. Email: mark.wildon@bristol.ac.uk